A Quarter After One
by Barbie Shoes
Summary: "Emma did not expect to see 'Regina Mills' at the top of the display. She opened her other eye, becoming more alert as she took just another second to makes sure the sleep had cleared from her vision and she was reading correctly. Yes, Regina was definitely calling her." Swan Queen, Oneshot. Drunk!Regina


_A/N: Drunk!Regina. Written for manderlingreen's tumbler post "You know I'm always seeing Emma drunk dialing Regina in fanfiction. I kinda want to see Regina drunk dial Emma!" Hope you enjoy!_

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Emma had been in the middle of a dream. A _really good _dream. One starring Regina Mills, and damn it if they weren't _just _getting to the best part, when her phone began vibrating against the bedside table like the world's largest, angriest wasp.

Unwilling to open her eyes, as if perhaps she could hold her place in the dream by denying reality, Emma's hand sought blindly for the incessant device. Whoever it was, they were going to get an earful. Not only had they woken her up in the middle of the night, but they had interrupted the best and only intimate moments Emma really got to spend with Regina – those of her imagination. She cracked an eyelid, peering at the screen in order to deduce who was calling and exactly what type of verbal lashing she should have prepared. She did not expect to see 'Regina Mills' at the top of the display. Emma opened her other eye, becoming more alert as she took just another second to makes sure the sleep had cleared from her vision and she was reading correctly. Yes, Regina was definitely calling her.

Emma quickly swiped to answer before it could go to voicemail. "Regina," she grumbled, "It's the middle of the night." While still annoyed at having been roused from her sleep, previous plans of admonishment were long forgotten.

"I know that," Regina replied, unremorseful.

"Well, then," Emma said firmly, "you had better be in some mortal danger, or have a damn good reason for waking me up." Though, a secret part of her didn't really mind waking up for Regina as much as she might let on.

"Emma," Regina said seriously, her voice oddly heavy. "I have to tell you something."

"Yeah?" Emma yawned despite her efforts to stifle. "What is it?"

"_You_..." Regina drawled, putting too much emphasis on the word, "are an idiot."

"Really?" A hand came up to rub tiredly at her eyes, though Emma was nearly unphased by the remark. "_That_ couldn't wait 'till morning?"

"No," Regina insisted. "Because _you_... You are filling up _my_ mind with all of your... Your _idiocy_."

"What?" Emma frowned into her darkened room. The haze of sleep had worn off, and she began to realize that something was definitely amiss. "What does that even mean?"

"It means you are an idiot," Regina continued haughtily, as if Emma were simply to dim to comprehend her words. "Such an idiot, that you are making me into an idiot."

Suddenly, the pieces clicked into place. A midnight call, her thick voice, the nonsensical babbling. "Regina," Emma inquired with some amusement. "Are you drunk?"

Regina clicked her tongue disdainfully. "What did I _just_ say?"

"You said I was an idiot." Emma grinned comically to herself. This was certainly a whole new side of Regina.

"Who is making me an idiot, too," Regina snapped back. "An idiot like you."

"I'm going to take that as a 'yes' to being drunk."

"I am not drunk," Regina argued. "I am... inebriated."

"Alright, so you're a classy drunk," Emma rolled her eyes. "Whatever. You still totally drunk dialed me."

"I most certainly did not," Regina retorted.

"Really," Emma chortled. "In that case, I'd love to know _why_ we are on the phone, at a quarter after one o'clock in the morning, talking about what an idiot I am."

Regina said nothing, but a strange rushing noise could be heard over the line in her silence. At first Emma had assumed it was the woman sighing, but the sound had far too much bluster for that. When she realized it was the wind, that Regina was somewhere out there drunk and alone, Emma couldn't help the small knot that formed in the pit of her gut, wiping the smile right off her face. "Regina, where are you?"

"It's none of your concern," Regina replied.

"Yes, it is," Emma pressed, already out of bed and wiggling into her jeans. "Tell me where you are. I'm coming to get you."

"No," Regina argued petulantly. "I don't want to see you."

"Your midnight phone call suggests otherwise," Emma countered. "I swear to god Regina, you do _not _want to make me come looking for you."

There was a long beat of silence, and then Regina finally huffed, "I'm at the pier," before hanging up the line.

Emma shook her phone, growling at it as though the insufferable woman were trapped inside. She grabbed her jacket and hurried out into the night, determined to find Regina before she wandered off.

Pulling up to the pier, Emma was actually surprised to see the woman still sat obediently upon one of the many benches overlooking the water. She knew Regina had heard her arrive, and could hear her boots against the pavement as she approached, though the woman refused to turn around.

Regina's eyes flicked sideways as Emma entered her peripheral vision, jaw setting as her gaze returned to the waves. "I hate you," she pouted quietly, whatever venom she had hope to spew completely lost in her adorably childlike defiance.

"I know," Emma chuckled, pulling the loaded woman to her feet and securing an arm around her waist.

"I can walk just fine," Regina complained, but Emma didn't let her go.

"Humor me, okay?" Emma pleaded gently. Regina gave a contemptuous scowl, yet allowed herself to be escorted to the car without further protest.

Pulling up to the mansion, Emma thought the woman might have fallen asleep in the car. She was just debating how best to transport a dead weight body on her own, when she was startled by Regina's voice.

"You're infuriating," the woman announced, stumbling a bit over the latter word. "You know that?"

"I've heard," Emma drolled.

"You are," Regina continued. "With your stupid car, and your stupid jackets, and your stupid hair."

"Got it, I'm a stupid idiot. Glad we had this chat," Emma snapped. There was no vigor behind Regina's ranting, and Emma knew it was just the alcohol talking, because she was pretty sure they were friends now. Or at least friendly. That didn't mean she was enjoying the sentiments.

Emma heaved the woman out of the car and up the walk. She could swear Regina had somehow gotten more drunk between the pier and now, doing her best to prop her up while unlocking the door. Then began the long journey up the steps.

"The Savior," Regina scoffed when they reached the top, continuing to ramble all the way down the hall. "Who did you even save? Not me. Nope. You ruined it. You _ruined_," she pointed to herself dramatically, "me."

At that point, Emma had had enough. It was the middle of the night. She was tired, and doubly so for having dragged Regina's uncooperative ass all around town. "Alright," she snapped in frustration, plopping Regina onto the bed in a sitting position. "Tell me, just _how the hell_ did I ruin _you_?"

For an instant, Regina's expression turned pitiful before she changed her mind, grabbing fistfuls of Emma's jacket and pulling her down until their lips impacted in a sloppy, desperate kiss. Emma's stomach somersaulted despite the lack of grace, hardly able to process the fact that she was actually kissing the woman she had literally only dreamed of ever being this close to mere hours ago. It only lasted a moment before her brain caught up, remembering Regina's intoxicated state, and Emma pulled away.

"See?" Regina wilted dejectedly upon the halting of her affections.

"Regina," Emma said with a soft smile, "you are not ruined. You're just drunk. Wouldn't you rather wait to do this when you're sober?"

"No," Regina insisted, trying to pull Emma closer once more.

"Regina..." Emma chided lightly, and the woman loosened her grip again.

"What if you don't want to anymore?" Regina peered up sadly, her beautiful brown eyes shining with questions and doubts.

"Unlike you, I'm perfectly coherent," Emma chuckled, cupping the woman's face in her palm. "And I can promise you, I _will_ want to."

Regina smiled just a little, reaching up to toy clumsily with a lock of Emma's hair. "Will you stay here with me?" she asked, with such earnest hope that there was no way Emma could have ever denied her.

"Of course."

Emma slipped them both out of their shoes and pants, too tired to bother with anything else tonight. She made certain Regina was comfortable, then lay down in the bed behind her. She molded their bodies tightly together, placing a chaste kiss on the other woman's shoulder and holding on securely as she whispered, "I will always stay with you, Regina."


End file.
